Thursday, 28 November 2013

Attitude of Gratitude

I think I just realized that I haven't announced my pregnancy to the blog world, although I think most of you know by sorry if you don't!  Anywho, my due date was November 22...that's 6 days ago. I will say that my due date and the 2 days that followed were tough.  I was weepy and feeling all out of control of my life and my body.  I don't like to be out of control.

A few things have been said to me that have helped put things into perspective.  One was from my pastor,  Fr. Bala who reminded me that every time someone called me or emailed or texted or stopped me at Church to ask how I was feeling, it wasn't to make me crazy, yet only out of love and concern.  While I knew this all along, it helped to hear it.  He said to reflect on how many people care about me instead of how anxious it was making me.  (I'm feeling so much better about this, so if you are one of the people checking on me, don't stop!!!).

The second came from my friend, Sue (one of the ones texting to tell me she was praying for me).  I told her I think that by being overdue, I was being taught a lesson in "letting go" and was not experiencing peace.  Again...hard for this control freak.  She told me this:  "Put yourself before the Presence of Our Lord.  Squeeze your hands really much you are holding onto it...then slowly open your hands and hand it to him!!  He wants it!!  Stay in His Presence!! That's MY peace, just sayin'."  After she sent me this message, I realized that I was literally walking around with my fists clenched.  I have since let it go and feel such peace.

The last thing I heard was last night and is more about preparing me for the pain of childbirth I will be enduring soon.  It was from a podcast by Fr. Michael Schmitz on his homily from 11/24 called "The Plan."  He said this:  "Here is Eve, and she doesn't trust in God's love, and so she turns in on herself.  And so what does God say?  God says, 'The problem is that you've turned in on yourself.  The solution is that you need to die to yourself.  And so what am I going to do?  I am going to allow you to experience pain in bringing forth life so that you can know the cost of love.'  The point of that pain in childbirth is not punishment.  It's meant to be remedial training.  Eve didn't know how to love, so I am going to teach you that love costs something."  How beautiful is that?!  That God gave me this message so that I can reflect on dying to self and that love costs something.  The end result of my pain will be the love of a baby.

All of this is mainly for me to look back on in the future and see how I was feeling when I was 41 weeks pregnant.  I'm very grateful today.  Grateful to be pregnant when I know so many others who long to conceive and can't.  I'm grateful that I got to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner with my sweet family and not in the hospital.  I'm grateful that God has a plan for me and this little one's arrival.   And while I don't know when it will be, I do know it WILL BE EVENTUALLY!!!  I won't be pregnant forever.  In the meantime, I am letting go of control slowly but surely.  Oh, and here is a pic of how I look at this point.  As much as I hate to post this big mama pic of me (or a pic of me at all), I know I'll want this on here to remember.  I wish I could post the ones of me and the kids...they are super cute.  I'm also grateful that physically, I feel good.  Things could be worse, right?  Thanks to you all for your prayers.  I definitely feel them...keep them coming!  I'll let ya'll know when sweet angel arrives!

Monday, 11 November 2013

From a Daddy's Eyes

The following incident took place when Muhammad Ali's daughters arrived at his home wearing clothes that were not modest. Here is the story as told by one of his daughters:

When we finally arrived, the chauffeur escorted my younger sister, Laila, and me up to my father's suite. As usual, he was hiding behind the door waiting to scare us. We exchanged many hugs and kisses as we could possibly give in one day.

My father took a good look at us. Then he sat me down on his lap and said something that I will never forget. He looked me straight in the eyes and said, "Hana, everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to. Where do you find diamonds? Deep down in the ground, covered and protected. Where do you find pearls? Deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell. Where do you find gold? Way down in the mine, covered over with layers and layers of rock. You've got to work hard to get to them."

He looked at me with serious eyes. "Your body is sacred. You're far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too." Source: Taken from the book: More Than A Hero: Muhammad Ali's Life Lessons Through His Daughter's Eyes.

Tuesday, 5 November 2013

Theology of Her Body

This is a beautiful view from a man's standpoint...